Let’s talk about what’s really going on. What I want to write and do and what’s actually happening at this moment is so completely at odds that I have to admit for maybe the first time in my life that I have no control over the way the world works. I’d go even farther and say the more effort I put into controlling the outcome the more opposition there is.
What does this compare to? I’m thinking the opposite of magnetic attraction, but what’s the word for that? Google isn’t telling and neither are the Wikis, but maybe I just don’t feel like looking hard enough.
Blog posts. I know a whole lot of you write blog posts and plan them out ahead of time, maybe even write them ahead of time, maybe even write several of them ahead of time and get all caught up and when the time comes to bring them out into the light you click your fingers and Ooh-la-la there they appear all shiny and brand new.
I love you for doing that.
I love you for your forethought, your planning and your ability to focus.
I thought quite a while back that I wanted to write a blog post about my wedding. I thought, well, I’ll wait until it’s my anniversary and use the wedding as my Throw Me Thursday blog post and everything will be peachy keen and lovely and tra-la-la the world will have a blissful sheen covering it’s bald spot for this one day.
I got all tech happy an hour before I should have had the thing written and got all jiggidy and thought I’d make a slide show put to music and it can’t be that hard even though I’ve never done it before and I followed some program I heard was easy and spent all this time trying to get into these 1,300 wedding photos (1,300!!!) and sort it all out because I had a pretty good idea of what I really wanted to do with them and really, I only needed to use about 20 or so and…
My husband is working right now. It’s 11:29 pm.
Tomorrow he’s not working and we’re going on a date, the first since February, my birthday. We’re like kids when it comes to dates. We’ll probably play mini golf. Or ski ball, I love ski ball. I do this thing where I have to stand a little to the side and throw the ball really hard and it pops up and hits the top of the cage and bounces down into the 10,000 point hole up there in the right hand corner. I’m bad at every sport there is. But I rule at ski ball.
So we’ve been married for 7 years and this morning I didn’t want to get out of bed, not because I felt bad or hungover or anything, but because I was up too late messing around with these wedding photos, but the kids don’t know that and they wouldn’t care anyway so they get up at 7 like they always do.
Well, Ivy, she’s four and a half and she “gets” things now. Well, I say to Ivy that it’s our anniversary and could they please just do this one nice thing for us and let us sleep a little longer and she says that’s a great idea and she convinces Azy, who is newlyish 3, that they should come down stairs and make cards for us. Isn’t that nice, little kids making anniversary cards for Mom and Dad? It is nice and they came back up stairs about ten minutes later, so I didn’t really get any extra sleep, but they came back up and gave us the cards which were my really cute Thank You cards, but they drew inside and made them all special.
But then Ivy. Ivy decides that since she’s making cards for Mom and Dad she should make something fun, something she likes in her cards. So she draws a bunny and the bunny has four zig-zaggidy lines in different colors, one of which connects with the bunny and the other three of varying lengths. She says to me, here’s the bunny, can you tell which path to take to get to him? And I guess the orange one because that’s the right answer and she’s so proud of herself just then because she didn’t just make a card, but she made an activity card like the ones in her work books and I think this–I think how cool kids’ brains are.
I think, my kids make me absolutely nuts, so nuts I sometimes start bawling in the car but. But. Wow.
Seven years Mike and I have been married.
Seven years and we have made two human beings. From scratch.
That’s pretty cool.